Other people's children

Please allow me to preface by saying...I am not perfect. I am far from perfect but when it comes to manners, my children will excel in that!

We moved to our new house about a month ago. In that time frame we have met the neighbors and their children. Who I like. They are nice and friendly and offer to help out when I need my mower looked at or some advice on pool maintenance.

I guess they like me to for my neighbor across the street asked me to look after her almost 3 year old son. I was more than happy to help out. The only catch is...he is still in diapers and has a really bad speech delay that I can not understand anything that he is saying.
When I found out that the older sibling would be staying too, I was relieved.

She was supposed to be home by 8:30 that evening. Well, I have a two children, one which is a baby and needs his sleep. I thought 8:30, not bad I can still manage to keep on my routine.

I cooked homemade soup for the kids (which the mother said they eat anything!) and as I am serving the food, the sister tells me that the boy will only eat Mac and Cheese. Oh, I don't want a hungry kid so I make it. I serve dinner and the boy wants some of the soup too! He ate it and liked it. But I made this mac and cheese and I wont eat it, so I offer it to him and he wants that too. Great!! So he starts to eat it. WITH HIS HANDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yellow pasta all over my floors and table and him. Gross. I, in a nice way, told him to use his spoon. Well you would have thought that I was yelling at him because of the look. Now I know he knows how to use the utensils because he did with the soup. Yuck. He was a mess. Then in a minutes time he is off the table and starts heading for the family room to play. He is covered in yellow cheese, sticky gross fake cheese. So I wash his hands and he is upset with me...but lets me clean his hands.

Food crisis under control. I have to clean the floor so the baby does not eat it. Gross!!!!

Ok on to the family room where he is taking a little hot wheels car going across my plasma TV screen. I flip. The sister is laughing and I am telling him no. He stops...when my back is turned he does it again...cars get put away! Now it is about 7:45 and I am thinking ok, the mom will be here in about 45 minutes.

No relief, it is now 9:10 pm and still no mom. Ok where are you lady!!! Now he does a smelly, messy diaper. I hate changing poops. Even on my own children I don't like poops. He wont let me change him, he runs away from me. Can you blame him?!?!?! A stranger wants to change his diaper! Double gross because now it really smells.
Sister helps me, still gross. He is tired...thank god!!! I put on Go Diego, Go!! That makes him quiet. Now my baby is fussy so I try to put him to sleep but the boy keeps running up and down the hall...baby still awake! 9:30 pm...WHERE ARE YOU LADY!!!!

I get the baby to sleep, put on the 3rd video of the night and put them all on the couch. I said to the sister, can you get the tooth brush for the boy? She tells me that he does not brush his teeth. WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Triple gross. He does not own a toothbrush at 3 years old. I offer him one and I get a negative response. Forget it, not my fight! I let him go to sleep with dirty teeth.

They all pass out on the couch, including my own and I shut the lights and leave the room. I pick up a People Magazine thinking she will be home any minute. Well I drift off to sleep...knock on the door at 10:40 pm! She is here!!!

She says sorry, and leaves.

Next morning outside I am with the kids playing....she did not even explain...so I asked. The recital ran late and that was that. No re-thanks, or I am so sorry....not even how were the kids? NOTHING!!!

Ok lesson learned.....never again!!!

When is it my turn?

July 31st will be my wedding anniversary. I will be married for 9 years. Nine years of a roller coaster ride of emotions. The first 3 years were ordinary...married, moved in together, bought house, had baby...all great things...then the wonderful husband decides to make a life changing decision even though I told him NO...not just no......but a, "what the hell are you doing, NO!!!!!" I was pregnant he joined the Army..to do his part, etc. I don't want to re-live it, but it is in my blogs from a million years ago...if you are interested.

Anyway, years progress...sell house, get pregnant, he goes away with the army, go through pregnancy alone, deliver alone...all the fun things...again, if interested just look at my posts from before.

BUT NOW...he is changing his career....his new venture will make him a pilot. He will give up his law enforcement career, which I am OK with but his school is costing over 70,000 and will take him away for 3 MONTHS!!!!!!! Again he will be away for 3 months somewhere like Arizona or Texas. Did I mention the 70,000.00???

So I asked him..."When is it my turn??"

He said, "I never stop you from doing anything"....
No, he does not but who is going to take care of my children? His response was typical. "Ask your mom or my mom to watch them". Ummmm dopey, they are our children to raise not theirs.

So another year goes by where I put law school off. But come September of 09...I will be in school and after my ultimatum, he will be out of the army.

Boy don't I sound like a cranky lady???

The question is.....Is he selfish, or does he really think this is benefiting our family?

When your baby boy becomes a big boy

I love being the mother of boys. I hear it from people with girls who say..."it must be tough" or "oh how can you deal with all that energy?"

I guess I don't know any better, I suppose.

But I love when they are tough and sweet at the same time. I love when I get flowers from outside in my own yard and the root is dangling on the bottom with dirt dust covering his chubby fingers. I love when I get pictures of Spider man with hearts and smiley faces on them.
You can see that my almost 5 year old is clinging on to being a mamma's boy and being a big boy. He can fall off his bike and not cry but when he sees blood he knows that it is OK to cry like a baby. I love when I drop him off at school and he runs back for one more kiss. I know in a few years that will seem like a life time away. I love that he still wants his teddy bear to sleep with but when it comes to changing in the morning for school, he wants his cool pants with the shirt that makes him look taller. I love my boys!

What I don't enjoy is when I walk into the bathroom and it smells like a bar bathroom and the floor is wet from pee and I have to break out the bleach and mop and wash the floor in the middle of the afternoon!

As a mother of boys, another thing I was not prepared for was driving in silence and looking in the rear view mirror and noticing that he is looking at something like a science project and then he belts out....hey mom, want to see my scab?! Here is a piece, you can hold it if you want to? YUCK! Then I had to explain what a scab is...double yuck!

I love that he thinks I make the best pancakes in the world! Especially since I put rainbow sprinkles on them ( i think he thinks they are candy)
What I don't love is that he is growing up right in front of me and there is nothing I can do to stop it. What I am grateful for is the amazing memories from his babyhood and I look forward to many, many, many more years to create more.

I am also grateful for the gift from God. My baby son that is only 9 months old. I am so happy that I have another little man that I can do all this stuff over again with.
At night I look forward to rocking him in my arms and he drifts off to sleep, and he is still clinging on to me. And I smile at his chubby cheeks and soft hair and his breathing. He relaxes me and I just stay in the rocking chair and just stare at him.

My boys are the best thing I did in my life, my greatest accomplishment....for that I am grateful!

Stamp it, send it and be done with it!

With another "Hallmark" holiday done with, I gotta ask........

When you send a card for an event, do you have to call on the day?

Let me clarify.......

Mothers Day. I am a mother so don't get me wrong when someone wants to send me a card or take me to dinner to celebrate the stretch marks, hemorrhoids and sleepless nights...I am all for it but I guess I want to know if I am obligated to make 500 zillion phone calls on the day to make the mothers in my life smile, even though I mailed a card? This goes for birthdays, anniversarys, holidays and so forth!

I guess it could be guilt making me pose this question. But I really think I need some clarification.

Last night after I got the children to bed, laundry in the dryer, dishes done and lunch made and packed in the Spider Man lunch bag, I decided to sit for a second and watch a minute of TV. 8:30 pm and I am ready for bed, and clear the mind!!!

Oh no, my mother has other plans! The phone rings...she had little kids at one time...did she forget how the slightest ring could startle a 9 month old?!?!?!?!?
anyway....
not a hello, not a how was your day...not a how are the kids...it was...(note the capital letters...this should explain the volume she spoke in) " WELL, DID YOU FORGET TO CALL ME? I AM SO SHOCKED THAT YOU OF ALL PEOPLE DID NOT CALL TO WISH ME A HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!!!

After the initial shock of being screamed at and put in the category of my crappy sister (long story) I had to remember who was on the other line. I wanted to yell and say ok so what the heck do you want?!?! But instead I lied and said I tried to call and no one answered. Well, caller id was not a good alibi so I blamed technology and said her phone log was wrong.

So, was I obligated to call even though I sent a card? It is not like I was sitting on the couch eating bon-bons!! I was cutting the grass, emptying boxes, teach my baby to walk and making snacks! (great mothers day!!)

So what I say is....

Stamp it, send it and be done with it!!!!!!

Manners!

I don't have a huge blog about this but just a question....

What happened to everyday manners?

I hold the door, say thank you, please and I don't pick my nose in the line at the salad bar. So why is it, no one holds the door for me? I am not asking for someone to open the door for me, just hold it when I am behind you! I got it slammed in my face way too much today!!!!

Not just a common cold

If anyone has read my blogs from way back when you will read that one of my pet peeves is when people send their sick kids to school. Thankfully, I have not had to deal with that this year, people are getting wise.....or something!

Now I have to target my frustrations at the sick adults who contaminate my air at work. We have a very lovely woman who handles our mail daily. She is a sweetheart and a very friendly face and I have nothing bad to say about her except....FOR THE LAST 3 WEEKS SHE HAS BEEN HACKING HER GERMS ON MY MAIL!!!!!

I am not a doctor but the sound of her cough and voice indicates she is ill. So I today kindly said, "boy, you sound awful still, what did the doctor say?" Her response was simple, "oh, I have not been to the doctor, but if this keeps up, I will call on Wednesday."

OK lady you have been hacking a lung for the last 3 weeks and you are going to wait until Wednesday???? YIKES!!!!!!
Just talking about it makes me want to wash my hands!!!!

A new house

After renting a house for almost 2 years, we decided to take the step and purchase another home of our own.

STRESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! STRESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That was me screaming, if you could not already tell :-)

My wonderful husband I feel sometimes is clueless!! I think I am realistic and sometimes I think he lives in a world of fantasy and candy canes. I think he feels we have unlimited money and time.
Why is that? Oh, I can tell you that...because he is clueless.
I do the bills, take care of schooling for Trent and have been dealing with real estate agent, the inspectors, the bank and the attorney! My fault! I take on too much and assume to much responsibility. I guess that is because I am a control freak. I like my fat little fingers in everything and to be able to control it all. I am sooooo weird!

Although I may be a stress case, I could not be happier with our (my) choice. It is 2 miles from my sister and in a great school district a deadend and a pool. I just have to find a new school for Trent, a babysitter for the baby, make sure that my schedule will allow me to get to work on time, etc....but I think coming home to my own house on a summers day and taking off my work clothes and jumping in the pool will make it all worth while. But I will miss my mother who is 2 seconds from me now....but maybe she needs a break too!!!

Now, just to figure out what to make for dinner tonight :-)

No! You have your own bed.

Trent is my sweetheart! I love his whole being.
But I think after 7 months the birth of his amazing little brother has affected him.

He will beg, plea, sneak and even cry to come into my bed. EVERY NIGHT this has been going on. Last night he was like Rambo crawling on the floor to my room. I hear the creaking of the floor boards and look up and there is his fuzzy little head. I smile but send him back..he said "mom, I just needed another hug" How could I refuse but then off to bed again. I feel like a horrible, evil mother for not allowing this but the bed is too small and he sleeps like a trapped bull. I don't want to get back in the habit and it is hard.

I will do everything to make a calm night routine. I will tell him stories, rub his head, get his small glass of tap water that he will request constantly. He is still little but at 4 1/2 he needs to be in his own bed. I give in every now and again when hubby is away but it has to stop.

I applaud the families who can stand the "family bed" but my kidneys can't take the kicking anymore!!

I don't want to talk about it!!

I am from New England. Born and raised.
I love the seasons, I love the sports, I love day to day changes...but what I don't love is the constant complaining or having to listen to the same conversations day in and day out!

Massachusetts gets cold, snow, rain and the dreaded winter mix of slush...yuck. No one really likes it but living here you have to expect it. But everyday that is all I hear is...oh another fabulous day in new england...or I can't take this weather anymore...or can you believe it is snowing again. Come on people, it is the winter in new england we are supposed to get snow and cold.
The other thing is the Super Bowl....ok we lost bummer....there is always next year. The Pats are human...aren't they entitled to lose a game here and there without being criticized for it??

I am looking for a mix in conversation. I would even welcome listening about Britney Spears for goodness sake!!

What have I become?

This blog makes me feel like I have the shoulder to complain too. Maybe it is my own little private Idaho!! But I honestly feel like I can spill the beans and not be judge...hence this complaint!

Being the proud mother of 2 amazing little men makes me the proudest person in the world. I feel that is the one thing that I have done without flaw. I also feel that I am doing an OK job at it, as well. With that, I also feel that I can let my hair down a bit...or up for that matter.

The other day, I came home from work. I just changed my schedule and work an additional 2 full days in the office. I get home at 4:45 pm, I rush and pick up the baby from my mothers (who thank GOD that she watches the baby) and then I go home to where Trent is waiting for me. He gets picked up from school on the two days from my mother in law...another Thank you GOD!!!

So at this point I am a mental case rushing because I know that dinner needs to be made, baby changed or fed, Trent makes a mess with his toys that require picking up and then I need to get out of my work clothes and into something much more comfortable....and up goes the hair in a clip. It is bad enough that I smell like baby formula at the end of the night but I don't need it in my hair too! So I go up to my bed room to change and I am rushing mind you to hurry and take care of everyone and there is my husband...relaxing!!!! RELAXING!!!! Oh he is home and I have to run around while all he has to do is just help a little! But I guess he is tired...did he wake up 5 times last night to replace a Binky that does not want to stay in my baby's mouth or did he go down to the kitchen at 4 am for a cup of cold apple juice, that my other bubba wanted??? No he did not. But that is not the true complaint here. What upset me is......when I got home I threw on the first comfortable thing I could find which happened to be a pair of feety pj's. If you don't know what feety pj's are, think of a big bunny..that's what they are. Anyway, mine are huge on me and I trip so I put a belt on so I could cook dinner without falling. I looked silly but it was warm and who cares I am home in the privacy of my own house!!!

Well, my sweet darling husband said" what the hell are you wearing" I said it was the first thing that I found that was warm. "well you make it very hard for me!" that was his response. I turned and said hard for what?and he said to find you attractive! WHAT A JERK!!!!
I made dinner and I ate alone...and then of course I yelled after and told him that he was rude and that he is not perfect and I do everything and if I want to put on something ugly I will.He said just because you are a mother you don't have to look like one. You leave for work all cute and come home to me and don't care what you look like. He was so bent out of shape...like I don't care about him or something.
I just ignored him and went to bed....of course I changed into my silk pj's...not for him but the others get to hot!!! Can you believe him???? or have I become a "mom"????

The desire to read

Trent is my sweetheart. Smart, funny and totally cute.
Lately, he has been going around and pronouncing words and telling me what letter they begin with. I asked him if he would like to read. He informed me that he knows how to read already. I had to bust his bubble and tell him that memorizing his story word for word is not reading....it is memorizing.
His face had many looks just then...confusion, doubt and disappointment.

I could not stand to see him like that so, I bravely told him that "Mom is going to teach you how to read!" Well, the happy face came back and was thrilled to learn that he would be the only one in his K1 class to be able to read.

As I turned the lights off and tried to drift off to sleep, I was haunted by the thought of me not being able to teach him how to read....not that he would not be able to do it but I have NO IDEA HOW TO DO IT!!!!!!!

Flick goes the lights and I take my hot pink pj's with lipsticks and lips all over them and jump on the computer and I do a Google search on "How to teach a child to read". It took me forever to get through the lists of what to do, what not to do and what books I had to purchase in order to teach my very eager boy how to read.

The suggestions were from people who home school their children and they already have the supplies and the time slotted for this stuff. I was trying to make this fun and do it at his pace...and he is only 4.

Off goes the lights and I get some sleep.

The next morning I get him to school and I ask his teacher if it is a good idea or will it set him back, blah, blah....she said it would be great if he has an interest and not to force it. I asked her professional advice and she told me that she would consult the K2 teacher.

I am grateful for the teachers who really do care and I am happy I made the choice to send him to this school. I will wait for the advice from the teacher and I will use his chalk board in his bedroom to do some simple phonics and make it fun. But if anyone who has any advice or experience with this...I would love to hear from you.